You Have A Decision To Make
by Ashley Appleappachia Rae
Summary: Agent Carmen Carter was assigned to track The Maximoff Twins but when they drop off the radar she turns to Clint Barton to find out what really happened to Pietro and sister in Hydra and after The Battle of Sokovia. When the truth is revealed she has to choose between the man she thinks she loves and the man she's starting to fall for. Hawkeye x Carmen (OC) x Quicksilver
1. Chapter 1

"Carmen? What are you doing?"

I jumped and turned round to see Clint staring oddly at me. I dropped what I was holding at once and he raised his eye brows.

"Nothing. I was...just looking."

"Yeah I get that. What's this?" he asked picking the piece of fabric I'd dropped off the floor. He almost let go of it at once and looked up at me with sad eyes. "Where did you get this?"

"They were just going to throw it out."

Clint sighed and carefully placed it on the back of the couch. "You gotta let this go."

"How can I? Look you were there...just tell me what happened."

"No."

"Clint _please_ "

"I can't Carm just stop asking."

"Where is he? Why won't anyone tell me? And what about this?" I picked up the fabric and shook it in Clint's face. He leaned back away from it and grimaced. "You can't even look at it! _Tell me_ what happened to him."

"Why do you care? You never even met the guy!"

I blanched at that. If he only knew. I had, though I could never tell Clint. I'd been monitoring the twins on Fury's orders for a while now. Ever since an incident in the Sokovian capital Nova Grand had drawn S.H.E.I.L.D's attention to them.

"Maybe not." I lied "But they were under my charge until they went M.I.A, so I deserve to know."

"Then ask your sister, I'm sure she can fill you in."

I laughed without humour "I've got the clearance level for this, Sharon hasn't."

"You're not an Avenger Carm, if Fury isn't letting anything slip I can't either. And don't even bother asking Nat, it would be easier to get blood out of a stone."

"What about-"

"Wanda? She's still in seclusion. So she doesn't hurt herself..or anyone else."

"That's not fair, she hasn't even done anything, Clin-"

"I've got to go. Please, for your own good, move on." He said squeezing my hand and walking out of the room.

 _Move on?_

"Wait. He's...he's not dead is he?" I asked Clint's retreating back. He paused for the slightest of seconds then left the room.

My heart sank as I stared down at Pietro Maximoff's bloody shirt draped over the back of the couch. "Don't you dare be dead." I said " _Don't you dare_."

I rushed to the lab and found the box of his things that thankfully hadn't yet been thrown away. I riffled through it at top speed trying to find anything that could tell me once and for all what had happened to Pietro.

"Agent Carter? You can't be in here." said a lab technician I only knew by name. I smiled charmingly and picked the box up in my arms.

"Sorry Dewitt, I've just gotta collect this for Barton."

"I thought no one claimed-"

"Must be important can't keep him waiting, see you." I said and quickly backed out of the doors.

I found a deserted room and emptied the contense of the box onto the floor. Apart from a pair of bloodied jeans and sneakers there was nothing else in there. " _Damn it._ " I yelled and threw the box behind me. It had now been over two days since the team got back from Sokovia without the eldest twin. And since then I'd barely been spoken to by anyone. I'd tried to visit Wanda but they wouldn't let me anywhere near her for 'safety reasons'.

None one knew my real relationship with the twins. My mission had been strictly no contact but I'd broken that one and only rule. I needed to know where Pietro was. I had to find out or I would lose my mind. I had feelings for him but I couldn't tell anyone, not even my sister or I'd risk letting slip what I'd done. I could lose my rank and all contact with my friends.

Contact...wait. His phone.

That wasn't in the box so it could still be on him. I pulled my own out so fast I almost threw it across the room. Flipping through my contacts I found the right coded contact number. It rang and rang until the voicemail came on. I didn't realise until this very moment how much I missed his voice. No answer.

"Where are you?" I said gulping back a sob and letting the phone die.

I rang the phone a few more times throughout the day just to hear his voice. It would die eventually so I wanted to savour every word I could. Each time I laughed wetly as he tried to leave the message and Wanda kept interrupting him _"You've reached Pietro's ouch-_ ' Wanda had pinched him _'-the Maximoff's phone, leave a message. By- What? Why does it matter Wanda? Alright._ _ **Please**_ _leave a message. Bye."_

The base started to shut down around 11pm, most of the lights had been off and doors closed. I headed back to my room admitting defeat and closed the door but there was already someone sat on my bed.

"Sharon! You scared the crap out of me." I said trying to slow my heart beat down

"Sorry sis." she said rising from the bed and giving me a hug. The moment her mouth was near my ear she whispered very fast "I'm gonna slip a piece of paper into your pocket, read it when I've gone. Don't tell anyone I gave it to you and get rid of it right away. There might be camera's around." she finished and pulled away with a slight smile. "Just wanted to say night."

I tried to force a smile back as she left but it had all happened so fast I didn't know what to do. The door closed behind her and my hand dived into my pocket. I went to the bathroom and unfolded it.

 _Carm,_

 _I know about you and Pietro. I hate seeing you in the dark so I did some digging. The lab on level 4 has a medical facility in the back, but you'll need a code, tell the tech Lowery I sent you, no one else. He owes me a favour. Don't tell anyone you're going or where you were._

 _I hope you find what you need._

 _S x_

I let out a breath of relief and my shoulders seemed to rise as a tiny portion of the weight lifted. Sharon said I had to get rid of this now, I found a match and burned the note before leaving for the lab right away.

"Its afterhours Agent and I'm just about to leav-"

"Lowery is it? You're not going anywhere until you tell me what I need to know."

"Who are you?"

"Carman Carter. Agent 13's sister she sai-"

"Shh. Fine. Through here. But keep your voice down alright."

I nodded and followed him to the back wall where a huge door blocked our path. He punched in a few digits' and it buzzed us in. "Through there." he nodded at a glass section off wall.

My heart was racing but I carried on and looked through the glass. Inside lay a body. It was hooked up to well over five sets of machinery, more than I'd ever seen on one human. Their chest rose and fell slowly so they were alive, but not awake. Through the wetness in my eyes I spotted a gleam of silver white hair.

"Pietro!" I yelled and hammered on the glass. Lowery ran up and restrained my arms

"Keep it down!" he scalded and I wrenched my arm out of his grip

"What are you doing to him?" I asked him in a sharp voice

"Trying to keep him alive. Shock like that isn't going to help." he replied and I let me arm fall

"Is...is he ok?" I asked and my voice caught as I looked at the familiar man laid feet away from me.

"He's dying. More every day I think. He hasn't got much time left."

"Well do something!" I yelled and the tears spilled over my cheeks "Save him! Isn't that _your job_."

"I didn't sign up to bring people back from the brink of death Agent so don't put this on me. Your boy in there made his own choices, saved Agent Barton's life, so be grateful he isn't in there too. I know you care about _both_ of them."

He'd ended up like this saving _Clint's_ life? I could hardly believe it, Pietro hated the Avengers.

"Has he even opened his eyes, moved, or done anything?"

"No." he said calming down slightly "He just keeps muttering the word 'Karma' over and over, maybe he did something and he came back to bit him in the ass?"

"Karma? You sure?"

"Yes we have to log everything down. He's been asking for his sister of course but apart from that all he's said is karma. That mean anything to you?"

I deliberated telling him but I couldn't. If Pietro died my hands needed to be clean of involvement with him and his sister, getting roped back in if he wasn't going to survive would only endanger me. He wouldn't want that. How could I tell his man that Pietro was asking for me? That the first time we'd met and I'd told Pietro my name he'd thought I'd said Karma not Carman. I guess it just stuck after that. I liked being the good karma in his life that was so often filled with bad.

"No. It doesn't ring any bells." I said "Can I go in?" I asked hesitantly

"I f you don't touch any of the equipment. You have a few minutes then you have to leave. I've turned off the surveillance but it only lasts ten. And agent..say goodbye, it might be your last chance."

"Thank you." I said as I walked in and stretched out a shaking hand. I could see his phone laying forgotten on a far table, so I'd pretty much been calling an empty room.

"H h hey Pietro." I said slowly slipping my hands around his strong one "Its Carman. I dunno if you can even hear me but I want...no I need you to wake up. Wanda needs you back, you can't leave her, or leave me."

Nothing.

"Pietro come on." I said and my voice rose a little " _Wake up."_ I whimpered as I shook his hand slightly " _Please_. You can't die yet..you gotta get old so I can't make fun of you when you get slower. I guess you'd hate that huh? Serves you right messing me around all the time...funny I wish you were here to annoy me right now." I leant down and pressed my lips to his cold hand "I gotta go but hold on though. You're strong like your sister you can get through this. And...thank you..for saving him."

There was a knock at the door and Lowery called me back.

I was sat in my room hours later when there came a sharp tap at my door. I rose stiffly letting Pietro's shirt fall to the floor and opened the door to find Clint staring back at me. He looked really beaten down.

"Can I come in?" He said dejectedly. I moved aside and he sat himself on the edge of my bed. "I'm sorry to barge in like this Carm but...I don't want to be alone right now."

"What's wrong?" I asked sitting down next to him.

"Survivors guilt I guess." he said looking down at his hands. Did he not know Pietro was still alive? Or was he so sure he was going to die he'd given up on hoping?

"Who-"

He looked at me intently and then spoke "You know who. You've had to have guessed by now right. I know I let it slip earlier."

"Yeah..I guess. Clint what happened?"

"I wasn't fast enough. My fault I guess, he was a good kid." He said and let his head fall into his hands before I could see the wetness in his eyes.

"Clint don't. Please don't blame yourself. People make their own choices." I said whilst pulling the hands back from his face "You're a good man, this doesn't change that. And I'm glad you're still here."

"You always know what to say to me, how do you do that?" he laughed slightly

"I'm awesome." I laughed and then stopped as he stroked a piece of hair back from my face. I was so taken aback I froze.

"Sorry." he said drawing back.

I thought about him then, really thought. About how I felt about him. If I was truthful with myself I did really care about him, more than I liked to admit to anyone. The odds were stacked against me with Pietro, and right now I just needed someone to be with, I needed comfort.

"No." I said as Clint started to get up "It's ok." I said taking his hand and standing next to him.

He stared down at me confused until I looked up at him. Very slowly he raised his hand to cup it round my cheek and leaned into me. As he pressed his lips against mine I felt his hand on my back pulling me into him. I responded a lot more enthusiastically that even I thought possible. Those hands I so often saw notching arrows on his bow were now wrapped around me, in my hair, on my skin, it was intoxicating.

I shrugged off my jacket and let it fall to the floor as Clint did the same. The moment I'd done it my hands were back on his body and my lips back on his.

"You're sister is gonna kill me." he chuckled against my skin

"Probably." I laughed as he lifted me up and onto the chair. I spotted my jacket in a heap on the ground next to Pietro's shirt and suddenly felt very guilty. I cared about him too. What was I supposed to do?

"You ok?" asked Clint as he spotted my far away gaze

I shook my head and smiled "Sure." I lied. I'd be in pieces if Pietro never woke up, and it wasn't looking good. That's why I needed Clint now, and probably why he needed me. Who cared if it was only for the present. I lifted his shirt up over his head and he grinned at me as I brought my lips back to his.

There was a sudden commotion from outside and we broke apart. Clint got up lifting me off his lap and held his ear to the door.

"What is it?" I asked and he shook his head.

I placed my hand on his shoulder to get passed him and opened the door.

A about five people were blocking the view of the corridor a so I pushed passed to see what was wrong. They were all staring at a tall man stood in front of them, a man with white hair.

" _My god_..Pietro?"

"Carman!" he dashed forward and pulled me into his arms. I laughed and gripped onto him with all my strength. I felt him kiss the top of my head and almost melted into him. "God I missed you." he muttered

"You're alive." I half cried into his chest

"Pietro?" asked a disbelieving voice behind us.

Pietro let go of me to take my hand and we turned to see Clint staring back at us from the entrance to my room.

"Barton?" he laughed "You didn't see tha-" then he trailed off as he took in Clint's appearance and the way he was looking at our entwined fingers. "What?"

"Carman, what's going on?" Clint asked in a husky voice

I looked back at him trying to make him understand but the disappointment was etched in every line of his face. "Clint I-" I started but he'd already walked passed us, clapped Pietro on the arm and left with a quick "Glad you're back kid." to Pietro.

I dropped Pietro's hand turned to watch Clint walk away from me.

"I don't understand." said Pietro staring down at me with those big blue eyes.

"I promise, I'll explain everything." I said trying to keep my voice steady "But first, we need to find your sister."


	2. Chapter 2

We walked in silence to the holding cell Wanda had been locked away in. Pietro kept glancing down at me. I didn't know what to say or how to rid the look of shame and sadness from my face. After a minute he gently took my hand and gave it a tight squeeze of recurrence. That hurt, he was trying to be there for me when I'd clearly done something to hurt _him._ I let go after a moment when we came to the cell doors.

"Agent Carter not again. I can't let you-"

"Ok stop. This is Wanda's brother Pietro, pretty much the only person she needs to see now so you are going to open that door or I'll go and get Romanoff."

"You don't have the clearance." he said warily as Pietro stepped forward and glared at him

"Level six agent." I said holding out my badge "So yeah I do. Open it. Now."

The look on Pietro's face must have broken him because he moved aside to let us past. But before I could follow Pietro in the agent grabbed my arm "Watch your backs in there, she's crazy."

I had to restrain myself as I replied "If I ever hear you use that word around the Maximoff's again I will bust your rank so fast it'll make your head spin. Understood?"

"Got it." he said and let go of my arm

There was a small hallway inside with a room at the end. The room was lined with strong metal walls with small glass widows along the sides.

I had a strange sensation upon walking into the room, the walls were bulging outward like the inside of a fish bowl, or was it just my eyes? I suddenly realized what was wrong, the light in the room was too red and seemed to crackle with energy.

On the far side of the room sat Wanda. Her head was down so most of her hair covered her face. From the set of her muscles she looked like a cornered animal waiting to lash out.

I glanced up at Pietro whose face couldn't have looked more terrified. He threw out his arm to stop me moving any closer and shook his head.

"What's wrong with her?" I whispered.

The moment I uttered those words I wished I hadn't.

Wanda's head shot up and she looked directly at us with blazing scarlet eyes. The fury in her turned the blood to ice in my veins, it was like she didn't even recognize us. Pietro grabbed me around the waist and dashed out of the room. The moment the door slammed shut there was a sound like a bomb going off. Red light shone out of the space under the door and the walls of the room seemed to stretch like they were trying to contain much more power than they could manage. Perhaps the worst thing though was the bloodcurdling scream that came from Wanda's mouth.

"Stay here!" shouted Pietro as he let go of me

"Pietro come back!" I yelled as he opened the door to Wanda's room and disappeared inside.

The agent outside the door looked at me with a smug 'I told you so smile' so I slammed the door in his face.

The light subsidized and there was silence. I peeped into one of the windows and a sob came out of my mouth. Pietro was helping Wanda to her feet, the look on her face was as if she was seeing the sun again after being shut away for years. I could see their mouths moving but couldn't hear a word, I thought I could discern _'I thought you were dead_.' from Wanda though. Pietro carefully put his arms around her and she threw hers around him. I felt like I was intruding on a family matter but he met my gaze and beckoned me in with a _'It's safe'_.

I slowly opened the door and Wanda raised her head off her brothers shoulder. "Carman?"

"Hey Wand." I said staying back by the door. She let go of Pietro and held out her hand to me. I deliberated for a moment and ran into her arms. "I was _so_ worried about you."

"I'm so sorry. I'm alright." she said and took her brothers hand with her spare one "I'm alright now."

I felt her stiffen and looked up at her. She gave me a very confused stare with her eyes very slightly red. She was looking into my mind. I grabbed hold of her in a hug again and whispered in her ear "It's not what you think-"

"Barton?" she interrupted and pulled back "You and Barton? But I thought-" she paused and looked over at Pietro. "You know?"

He nodded and gritted his teeth. I could feel a knot tightening in my chest as I looked at him. I never meant to hurt him, I thought he'd never wake up.

"I..I should go." I said backing away from Wanda

"No Carman wait I didn't mean-" she tried but I shook my head

"Karma it's ok I understa-" said Pietro though I knew he didn't, he just wanted to keep me in the room

"No you don't. Just…just catch up I'll see you later. I gotta go..I'm sorry." I said before turning tail and dashing out of the room.

An hour later found me sat on one of the walk ways above the quinjet with my legs dangling over the edge. I didn't really know where else to go, I didn't want to see the twins, not now anyway.

"Hey."

The sudden noise made me jump and I grabbed hold of the railing of support. I turned and saw it was Clint.

"Hi." I said as he settled down next to me "Come to yell at me?"

"Do you want me to?"

"Of course not. But you deserve to if you want. Come on let me have it, I'm a big girl I can take it." I said and he chuckled

"Carm I won't hold you to anything that happened back there, we were both upset."

"Oh." I said dejectedly "Right."

There was an awkward silence which Clint broke after a moment. "But I just don't get why you'd let it go that far if you knew Pietro was alive, if you love him why-"

"I don't." I said and he stopped talking and stared at me

"What?"

"I don't love him. He means the world to me but I don't think I love him…not yet anyway."

A slight smile lifted the corner of his mouth but he quickly wiped it away. "And what about me? How do you feel about me?"

"I..I don't know. The same way I think." I said and he sighed

"Then it looks like you've got a decision to make." he said

"I don't know what to do Clint. What would you do in my place?"

He laughed and bumped my shoulder with his "You're asking me would I choose _myself_ or speedy?"

"Ok poor choice of words." I laughed

"Not your best." he said "I can't tell you what do you in this, for one I'm obviously biased." he took my free hand in both of his "And two if you make a choice and do it for either me or for him it's the wrong one."

"What do you mean? If I can still make it work after this then I owe it to him to try right?"

"And what about you? What do you owe yourself?"

I paused and watched his face "To be happy I guess."

"So who is going to make you happier?"

" _I. Don't. Know_. And it doesn't help that you're being so understanding and calm about the whole thing. Get mad, _do something_."

He let go of my hand and turned to face me "What do you want me to say? I can't get mad because he's my friend and saved my life. I owe him _everything_. But I want to be with you, you've known me forever we've been together here for years! I never did anything about it cos I wanted to let it happen on its own. But now this little punk comes onto the scene and suddenly it's like-"

I grabbed the collar of his jacket and kissed him. It only lasted a minute or so but when we broke apart he smiled at me "That's kind of a mixed signal Carm."

I put my head in my hand and groaned "I shouldn't have done that I'm sorry."

"Am I complaining?" he asked and put a finger under my chin to lift my face "Look just go and talk to him. I get it, you thought he was going to die but now he's not. See what's there or you'll regret it forever. Then when you figure it out I'll be here."

"What..like right here? You're gonna get bored-"

"No dumbass I meant in the general building." he chucked as I stood up

"You're a better man than people give you credit for Clint." I said as he stood up next to me

"Balances out all the harm I've done on the job."

"Nobody blames you for that. I don't." I said and moved into his chest "If we never get to do this again-"

He'd already caught my drift and wrapped his thick arms around me "Whatever you choose, do it for you not anyone else, remember that."

As he let go I had to stop myself from calling him back. He grabbed hold of a rope that was handing off the railing and jumped down leaving me by myself.

When I got back to my room someone was sat on the floor outside my door, their long trainer clad legs stretched out in front of them so they were obstructing the corridor. A few people stepped over him and smiled. I could see why. Pietro's back was rested against my door and his head was half lolled onto his shoulder. He looked so peaceful in sleep I didn't want to wake him.

"Pietro?" I said quietly shaking his arm

He stirred and blinked a few times "Oh hey" he said and jumped up "I was just waiting for you I.."

"Fell asleep?" I said with a laugh as he ran his hand through his messy hair "Come on in."

"I know I said I was alright with what I saw but honestly I'm not." he reeled off as soon as I closed the door behind us "You and Barton I don't…just tell me what I did."

"That tech told me you were gonna die Pietro, I made a bad choice because I let my emotions get in the way." I said very fast "You didn't do anything. And nothing really happened between me and Clint."

"Nothing? So he wasn't half naked then?" he said without looking at me

"That..that wasn't meant to happen-"

"Then why did you let it!" he turned round and shouted at me. I could see he was in pain and it was my fault. The only thing I could do now was tell him what I really felt.

"I needed it." I admitted

Pietro's shoulders drooped and he clenched his fists "Yeah well where were you when _I needed you_ huh? I woke up in a cold white room with a bunch of strangers, you knew I was there why…why did you leave me?"

"I wasn't supposed to be there at all. I only had a few minutes with you before they made me leave."

"So you didn't tell them you knew me?"

"No I didn't…if you died I didn't want people to get me involved, it would have been too hard."

"Maybe or you wanted to be with Barton more, you didn't want him thinking you were involved with anyo-"

"Stop it! I made a mistake in the heat of the moment, I'm human! I'm sorry I did but don't turn this into a game of who I love more…"

I didn't mean to say that. But it was true, I realized now I did love them both.

"Who you love more! Are you joking?" shouted Pietro "You've never once told me you loved me and now there's this whole other guy, a guy who was my friend!"

"Friend? I haven't seen or heard from you in over a month! For all I knew you and Wanda had joined Hydra for good! Then I find out _from Clint_ that you were in the battle in Sokovia, and all I get is this-" I yelled and picked up his bloody t-shirt off the floor and threw it at him "-No clue or anything to where you were or whose side you were on, what the hell was I supposed to think Pietro?"

"You should have known that I wouldn't have left if it wasn't for a good reason! I love you, why the hell would I just abandoned you like that?" he said and threw the shirt on the floor

"I have no idea but you did. One moment I'm in Sokovia with you guys and everything is fine and the next you've both dropped off the radar. Now you're saying I should have just sat back and relied on faith that you'd come back while you're off on your revenge kick? So yeah I reached out to him for comfort because I didn't even know if you'd come back to me in the end!"

The look on his face was as if I'd slapped him. He moved towards me quickly and grabbed my hips. My breathing was still fast and my chest rose and fell rapidly as I glared up at him. In one second he'd crushed his lips against mine and pulled us back against the wall.

"I didn't-" he tried to get out "-mean to leave you."

"Shut up." I said as brought my lips back to his "It doesn't matter anymore."

And it didn't, this was all I'd wanted from the moment he'd got back, I just hadn't seen it until now. He lifted me up so my legs we either side of his hips and pressed me against the wall. Someone in the next room banged their fist into the wall "Keep it down in there Carmen!" they yelled and Pietro started to laugh

I didn't break contact with his body at all for the next hour.

I got up and slipped on my dressing gown. Pietro was still fast asleep, the sheets tangled round his legs. It was cold in the room so I crossed to my window to close it. Outside I saw a figure jogging down the path. It was Clint.

He stopped to look over at my window, maybe he did that a lot because he seemed surprised I was staring back at him. I waved slightly and he gave me a small grin. It hurt how handsome and strong he looked in the morning light. I tried to tell him what I was thinking just by looking at him but I had no idea of knowing if he understood me or not.

I turned my head to look back at the man laid in my bad and my heart ached. My relationship with Pietro was volatile yes but we'd known that from the start, it had never come between us. But Clint..he was my safety, the one person I could always count on to be there for me when I needed them. When I looked back at Clint he smiled and set off running again.

Today I'd have to break the heart of someone I loved. And honestly, I had no idea which one of them it would be.


	3. Chapter 3

I spent the next few minutes watching Pietro, a grin slowly unfolding on my face as his arm tried to find me on the bed next to him and only came up with cold duvet. I crossed to the bed and sunk down onto the mattress. It was familiar to be here next to him. Sometimes on bitterly cold nights in Sokovia his body was the only thing keeping me warm. He rolled over and slipped his arm round my waist as I rested my head against his warm chest.

"You're up early." he said quietly

I raised my head and saw his eyes were open and staring down at me. "I didn't know you were awake." I said as I pulled the cover up around our legs

"I've been up since you left the bed, you think I wouldn't notice." he asked with a grin "You know you've got a habit of watching me sleep?"

"It's not really watching you sleep if you're pretending is it?" I smiled

"I guess not." he chuckled and I felt the rumble of his chest under my cheek "Why do you do it?"

"It's the only time you look really calm. I like that, since you're always so pent up all the time."

"I don't feel pent up right now." he said and stroked his fingers up and down the curve of my waist "I think I worked that all out last night."

"You're not the only one." I said as his hand worked its way down my thigh

"I missed this." he said as he hugged me tightly against his body

"Oh I'm sure you managed to entertain yourself just fine with the girls back home."

"What? How do yo-" he started incredulously

"Pietro you're a flirt, you always have been. Remember I was observing you _way_ before we even met, I saw you're patterns. That Zrinka girl, she's cute huh?" I inquired with my eyebrows raised. Pietro turned a very light shade of red and I had my answer

"I never slept with any of them." he said as he pushed himself up on his arm to look at me "I wouldn't-"

"Pietro I know, it's ok I'm just messing with you."

"You little.." he smiled and rolled over so he was hovering over me "Don't do that."

"Sorry, too fun." I said as he leaned down to kiss me "Wait." I said and pressed my fingers to his lips "I..I have to go talk to someone."

Pietro sighed and rolled back over onto his back "You mean Barton."

"I need to straighten things out, I owe him that much."

"Alright. But tell me one thing before you go...do you love me?"

I smiled then. This man was nearly all talk, sass and bravado but when it came down to it, he really cared about people. And lucky I was one of them.

"For the record-" I said as I pressed my lips to his "-I always have."

"Clint." I said loudly as I knocked on his door ten minutes later "Clint open up its Carman."

Nothing

"Clint you in there? I really need to talk-" I stopped as he opened the door. It looked liked I'd called on him just as he'd gotten back from his run, his torso was coated in a fine sheen of sweat and he was halfway through getting changed. "I...uh.." I tried to form words but I couldn't take my eyes off him.

He coughed loudly "Carm? You ok?"

"Yeah sure sorry." I recovered fast "Can I come in?"

"Sure. Is everything ok?" he asked as he closed the door and flicked on the overhead light. I wished he wouldn't have, it had thrown everything into sharp focus.

"I..I came to talk..." I tried again but he'd folded his arms across his chest and broken my train of thought. No one had arms like an archer. "Clint...could you put your shirt on please?" I asked whilst trying to hide the hint of a smile

"Am I making you uncomfortable?" he asked with raised eyebrows "We've trained like this all the time."

"You are but not in the way you think. Sorry." I said as I passed him his shirt

He shrugged it on and squinted at me.

"What?"

"You look different." he said with a small smile "You're glowing."

"I'm what?" I laughed

"Glowing, you know, like you look beautiful."

"Thanks." I said and lifted my hand to partially cover my grinning face

"You were with him last night weren't you?" he said suddenly

That killed the mood. It was like the temperature had dropped five degrees in the room.

"Oh." Was my only answer. He was associating my current mood with the fact that I'd slept with Pietro last night. He wasn't wrong but it wasn't the only reason I couldn't stop smiling. "Yes. I was."

"So that's it then. You made your choice." he said with a nod

"Clint you have to understand this wasn't easy...I care about you too."

"Just not enough to be with me."

"Please don't make this harder, if the situation was different maybe..."

"Hey Carm its ok I'm not trying to guilt trip you, I'm just...disappointed I guess. But you'll be happy with him yeah? You're sure?"

"Yes." I nodded sadly

"Then that's that."

There was silence in the room as I watched his face. He wasn't looking at me. He was hurt. Again, I'd hurt someone I cared about _again_. I small tear slid down my cheek and as I breathed in my breath caught in my chest. Clint looked up at the sound.

"Carm don't, come here." he said and opened his arms.

I shouldn't. I knew I shouldn't but like before I needed comfort and as usual Clint was my source. I walked into his arms and they enveloped me.

"I'm sorry Clint." I said as yet another tear slid down my face

His arms tightened around me and I felt him rest his chin on the top of my head "You have nothing to apologize for."

"But I led you on, I didn't mean it I was just thinking of myself and I let my feeling for you get in the way."

He pulled away and looked down at me "Well, no that wasn't cool but I get it. Guess I should have asked you out sooner huh?"

"Probably." I laughed wetly into his shoulder

"You know last year there was this place I wanted to take you, show you how to hunt. You would've love it."

"Sounds perfect but I was with Pietro back then."

"Ah for the love of God." he cursed "So when exactly did speedy come on the scene?"

"Well Fury had me tailing them for about a year before I made contact, that was..." I tried to think "Two years ago I think."

"Two years...right ok so I was seriously behind then."

"I wasn't will him until about six months ago so not as bad as you think." He laughed ironically and released me. "Are we still fri-"

"If you say friends I'm gonna shoot myself with one of my arrows." he laughed and leant down "You'll always be more than that to me Carm." he said quietly and kissed my forehead.

I wasn't quite sure what happened next but I think the door opened and someone wrenched Clint away from me and threw him against the wall.

"PIETRO!" I yelled as Clint staggered to his feet "What the hell!"

He didn't even hear me.

"This is the thanks I get Barton? For _SAVING YOUR LIFE?_ You move in on my girlfriend?"

"Pietro, kid that's not what-"

"Not what huh? You were kissing her and you're covered in sweat, what the hell were you two doing!"

"Pietro back off!" I shouted and threw my weight into his shoulder so he was forced to release Clint

He turned to look at me with misty but angry eyes "I thought you said it was over between you two?"

"It is." I said and tried to pull him back "We were just CLINT NO!"

I moved just in time to see Clint swipe Pietro's feet out from under him. I jumped back as Pietro's back hit the floor and Clint stood over him. "Quick little basterd." he said whilst pulling a shard of glass out of his arm from the smashed mirror behind him "But not that quick."

What happened next was a blur. Pietro jumped up and punched Clint in the face sending him back into the wall. I could tell he was using his powers because there was a faint blue haze about every move he made.

I didn't know what to do, I wasn't enhanced. And I couldn't possibly fight Pietro and a master assassin at the same time, I was good but nowhere near that good. The only thing I had on me was...my gun.

"GUYS!" I screamed above their yells and shouts. Clint turned at the sound of my voice but Pietro didn't. Instead he thrust his fist into Clint's stomach almost winding him. " _No!_ Pietro _please_!" but he still wouldn't stop. Clint was still fighting but he couldn't keep up with Pietro's speed, it was wearing him down, and fast.

I had to do something. Make my choice all over again. I didn't want to but if I didn't intervene one might actually cause the other real damage.

"Pietro." I said fairly quietly. The tone of my voice made him pause for a split second "I'm so sorry." I said as I pulled the trigger and shot him in the back.

An inhuman noise came out of my mouth as he slumped forward and Clint rolled out of the way.

Clint stared up at me like he'd never seen me before. "What did you _do_ " he coughed out and blood flecked his lips

"It's an icer Clint." I said in a shaking voice "He's not dead. Just knocked out." Then my legs gave out and Clint rushed to my side. "I couldn't let him hurt you, he would have, I had to..I had.." I couldn't speak anymore so I dissolved into intelligible sobs as I looked back at the man on the ground in front of me, the man I loved whom I'd shot in the back.

"Its okey shh its okey.." repeated Clint as he wrapped his arms around my trembling body

"Oh god I shot him, oh god-"

"Carm snap out of it. He's gonna be fine-"

"Wanda's gonna kill me, she'll actually kill me Clint."

"PIETRO!" came a terrified yell from the door way. Wanda ran in and flung herself next to her brother. "Pietro! What happened?" she asked us as she attempted to pull him up

"Wanda I-"

"I iced him Wanda." said Clint before I could get the words out. He still had his arms around me so he carefully took hold of my gun and lay it on the ground. "We got into a fight and it misfired, it was an accident."

"Is he alright?" she asked as she turned him onto his side. He looked like he was sleeping, much like he had this morning in my bed.

"He's fine Wanda. I promise, he'll wake up soon." said Clint when she continued to look unconvinced

"What were you fighting about?"

Oh crap, busted.

"Misunderstanding." said Clint "He thought I was with Carman, I'm not. It got out of hand."

"Alright.." said Wanda though she still looked worried and confused.

"We'll be right back." said Clint as he lifted me to my feet. Wanda barely noticed because Pietro had started to stir.

"Right." said Clint as we rounded the corner outside his room "Pietro didn't see you pull the trigger, I did it and it was an accident. This will all blow over soon. No Carm-" he said as I made to protest "Just follow my lead."

I nodded

When Pietro woke up we explained the best we could. He didn't take it well but after an hour or so he was on speaking terms with Clint.

I felt so guilty but deep down I knew I'd done the right thing. Had I iced Clint it wouldn't have made a difference, I'd be in the same boat, the only change was knowing that by shooting Pietro I'd stopped the fight altogether.

What made matters worse was one of Pietro's doctors catching up with him in a panic and informing us that he was supposed to come back to the lab for tests this morning because the medication that had slowly been helping him heal could have awful side effects. I dug my nails into my arm as the doctor reeled them off to us. Aggression, paranoia, anxiety, and sudden bursts of adrenaline. Too little, too late.

At least now he and I both knew why he'd acted the way he did. The first thing he did was find Clint and apologize. I loved him for that but I'd still seen him loose control and it had scared me. Also I was living with the guilt that in the heat of the moment I'd shot him and not the man I'd supposedly sworn I didn't want.

I accompanied them both to medical with Wanda and took her aside the moment the doctors got to work.

"I need you to do something for me." I asked her very seriously "And you're not going to like it."

"What is it?" she asked warily

"I want you to show me my greatest fear."

Wanda just looked at me perplexed.

"No no way. I don't know what it could do to you Carman." she said shaking her head "Why on earth would you want that?"

"I know what my biggest fear is, losing the person I love the most. And I already lost my parents. The only people I've got left are in this room."

"So...you want me to see if I can show you which one of them you fear losing the most? That way you know if you made the right choice or not?"

"Pretty much."

"Carman this is _insane._ Can't you just figure it out for yourself?"

"No, my brain is over thinking it, use your powers on me and my subconscious takes over. Please, I know this will work. I need to know once and for all, or it'll drive me mad."

"I...but you're like my sister, I don't want to do this to you."

"But you will, for both our sakes." I said and nodded my head in Pietro's direction. "He needs to know as well. Do it now before they can stop you."

Wanda took in a huge breath and placed her finger tips on the side of my temple. I watched her eyes glow scarlet for a moment and suddenly she was gone.

 _I was back in Sokovia with the twins, I remembered this. We were in the market, Wanda was looking at jewellery and me and Pietro we just walking slowly ahead._

 _"If I asked you to move out here what would you say?" asked Pietro slyly_

 _"Not this again."_

 _"Come on, tell me."_

 _"I'd say it's tempting but I work for Shield so it's a no go zone."_

 _"But if you didn't work for Shield?" he said throwing his arm round my shoulders_

 _"Then you'd have to find space for me wouldn't you." I said with a wink_

 _He stopped in the street and looked down at me. "You really would?"_

 _"I'd think about it. First we'd have to find a decent place not that crappy building you guys live in now."_

 _"Hey it's not that bad-"_

 _"Pietro there is a whole in your kitchen floor and you can see down into Mrs Kavsolvky's front room. That's not ideal."_

 _"True. We'll if I get a job-"_

 _"You, get a job? There aren't any jobs going this is Nova Grand they're all taken."_

 _"I'll figure something out Kapma."_

 _"Hold you to it..wait what's that noise?" I said as we rounded a corner onto the main road_

 _"Not another one." Pietro groaned as we took in the huge protest that was happening. "Come on we'd better go back and find Wanda."_

 _This was the last memory I had of the twins before seeing them again in America. That protest had ripped them away from me. They'd been approached by a group of military men the week before at a similar protest. I hadn't been there, the same men took them that day. Pietro had told me to stay back to stay safe. He said he'd come back from me. But they never did._

 _Obviously now I knew Hydra had gotten to them. Why was this the memory that Wanda's powers had brought up? I didn't lose anyone, they had both been fine but...I'd lost my hope at a life with Pietro. And it had hurt, hurt more than I thought possible. And now I knew, finally I knew what I wanted._

"Carman? You good?" asked Wanda as I opened my eyes.

I was. Wanda's powers hadn't gotten to me because the fear I felt in that moment wasn't there anymore, because I knew what I needed to do.

When I looked round Clint had gone. Probably best. This was how it was meant to be. Pietro was getting to his feet and waving away his doctor.

"I'm fine." I said to Wanda and gave her a wide smile. She looked surprised but pleased.

I crossed the room in three strides and pulled Pietro down to kiss me. He wrapped both arms around my waist and lifted up to meet him. As we broke apart he caught his breath "What was that for?" he asked amused

"The future."

"You mean...even after all that with Barton?"

"You're stuck with me Maximoff." I laughed as he smirked down at me

"I can live with that."


End file.
